You just know it can be traced back to a specific lawsuit

Here's another instalment of what is becoming an ongoing series of funny crap I see at uni. I was using the restroom in the physics building when this highly informative sticker on the wall behind the toilet caught my eye:



Seems a little redundant. If you don't know how to shit properly, you probably shouldn't be going to university.

Out of curiosity I checked a different stall and found one that wasn't ripped, with its helpful advice intact:



One can only assume the stickers have been put in place to combat the recent wave of students squatting on the toilets while they drop some friends off at the pool, only to shatter the delicate porcelain bowl and break their legs/arses. I guess I should report the torn sticker, before some innocent person forgets what to do when they pinch a loaf and ends up paraplegic. It's easy to see why it was ripped, of course: someone tried to steal the sticker so they could put it up at home to remind themselves of proper pooping protocol.

For a limited time*, a percentage** of all PayPal donations to me will go the the Royal Society for Prevention of Crapping Accidents***. Remember: Only YOU can prevent senseless toilet-based calamities!

* So limited, in fact, that the deadline has already passed.
** 0%.
*** Organisation may not exist.

Quality assured by Mike Hunt

In a lab at uni today I used this strange device:



More importantly, note the manufacturer:



It's not even a joke.

Time Cube

There is a loony in America called Gene Ray, who in 1997 created a website for his nonsensical "theory" called Time Cube. I won't even try to summarise it here because it makes absolutely no sense, but the website has become something of an internet phenomenon, drawing the ridicule and parody it rightly deserves.

Anyway, I was at a friend's place a couple of weeks ago when I saw this:



I present the 4 Colour Magic Time Cube Alarm Clock. I couldn't resist taking a photo.

Funnier still is the fact that it's not even close to being cubic.

A Google search for "time cube alarm clock" yielded a paltry six results, one of which was this photo. Much more cube-ish - worthy of Gene Ray himself.

Danger is my toilet's middle name

I couldn't walk past this without taking a photo:



Moral: A picture is worth a thousand words, but sometimes you don't know what all those words are.